Lesson 6 - I am upset because of something that isn't there --Robert

"I am upset because I see something that is not there."

This is the current objective of lesson 6, which further builds on the concepts of lesson 5, which help us to understand or to relieve ourselves of our emotional disturbances. The disturbances of the mind which all too often cause an uncomfortable emotional state, and affect the way in which we experience this illusion. It's important to realize this, because "the machine can run away with itself" as I like to refer to it, meaning the mind / body machine... when left unchecked can delve into extreme areas of negativity that can be debilitating.

I am applying the concept of this lesson to the same experience as mentioned in lesson 5. The friend whom I'm upset with due to reasons that are not quite clear to me. Before I discuss the magnitude of this lesson, I will take a step back and mention an experience I had over the weekend.

As mentioned in the popular sci-fi movie "The Matrix" the Neo character is given a choice. To continue to experience the illusion as it is, without the answers he seeks, or to experience the illusion as an illusion, therefore shifting his perspective from within the matrix, to his physical body which is outside of the matrix. This rebirth of consciousness is quite profound, and unless experienced can go unnoticed. Well my matrix moment occurred over the weekend, in the form that I perceive as a gift from the universe. I will not go into depth as to what my experience was, suffice it to say that my perspective dramatically shifted from the body/mind consciousness level - to a much higher level allowing me to see this reality as the illusion it truly is.

My choice was different than Neo however - as my decision was to accept this level of understanding, to accept the connection and the experience for that it was, but for the love of those who are still within this reality, I choose to stay and connect with them in the same manor as before. However now with the heightened awareness that this world, and all the trials and tribulations of it is just a dream, an illusion (however real it seems). This choice has massive implications, and I'm now fully educated as to the choices that I make, and the cause and affect relationships that they will incur, knowing that this world is an illusion - and my choices affect the entire game, so to speak.

I can no longer claim ignorance to this knowing, and now the only work that remains is to correct the fragile, often disturbed, pre-programmed, and misguided ego attachments that remain. The path is clear, the work is ahead, and here I am, working through it.

Of course, the test of this knowing comes shortly after in the form of an emotionally disturbed friend, and his obviously inappropriate actions. Now how do I define myself in relation to this experience? Do I resent him for his human frailties, or do I take a different perspective on it...? I choose to continue to see this reality as an illusion, as my gift has shown me the way.

Therefore - with this knowing through this gift, and this experience of my friend to test my knowing... how do I appease the mind/body (little me) consciousness? For one, realize that this is an illusion, that my thoughts are meaningless in the illusion, the physicality of the illusion is also meaningless, and so are the actions of others. "I am upset because of something that isn't there." Amen.

Thanks for reading.

Robert

Lesson 5 - "I am never upset for the reason I think" --Robert

Although I have not spent much time with this lesson, initially I have found this lesson more difficult. Specifically because the text challenges us with a variety of forms of this idea, such as:

I am not angry at ___ for the reason I think.
I am not afraid of ___ for the reason I think.

There are no small upsets.
They are all equally disturbing to my peace of mind.

When acting out of bias - applying to one disturbance, and avoiding others, use:

I cannot keep this form of upset and let the others go.
For the purposes of these exercises, then, I will regard them all as the same.

And finally:

I am not worried about ___ for the reason I think.
I am not depressed about ___ for the reason I think.

Like everyone else, like the most enlightened masters, we all have our stuff to deal with down here. There will always be someone who will challenge our ideas of forgiveness, and abundance, or what we percieve as "right living." I had a situation over the weekend where a particularly anti-social friend of mine was invited to my birthday, and as usual - was a pillar of anti-socialism. Not only that - after 20 years of knowing him, he didn't bring a gift! Not that the materialism is important - but the act of giving and receiving was denied, on a day reserved for that. So now do I look at this person, and analyze - well I know it's not a financial reason, so then what would it be? Normally - regardless of his actions I'd buy him a gift on his birthday just to experience the act of giving. However, now being married - questions of abundance come to mind. So do I stay with this feeling of lack, this feeling of disappointment, that if left unchecked could lead to resentment? No... so I apply the concepts and here are my results.

I am not upset at my friend for the reason I think.
I am not depressed about my friend for the reason I think.
I am not afraid of judgement for the reason I think.
There are no small disturbances to my peace of mind, this is one of them and they are all equal.

Intellectually, and I realize that on some level it is permeating my belief system, but I have yet to move from knowing these concepts to experiencing them fully. I can apply this exercise on an intellectual level, but I am not sure how well it helps to resolve my emotional disturbances. I will continue with it, and keep you posted.

Regards,

Robert

Lesson 4 - "These thoughts do not mean anything" - Robert

The lesson for this week was "These thoughts do not mean anything." I actually stayed with this lesson a bit longer than usual. I beleive Aaron has already moved onto Lesson 5, and will be posting some content shortly. However, I've liked and stayed with this particular lesson for a few reasons.

1 - Validation - I am validated in my understanding that now my previously learned concepts and ideas, or thoughts, are in themselves meaningless. I had learned this or come to this realization over several years of work, and refinement of self, but never fully adopted the idea. This validation aids my adoption, and helps me understand the dychotomy.

2 - Self Acceptance - I find that this particular exercise really helps me with my own personal self acceptance. We all struggle with this, if we didn't struggle with our identities, we wouldn't be here. What do I mean? You have a soul, its objectives, a mind with its objectives, and your body with its needs. If you haven't experienced this conflict you're not paying attention. That being said, I really like this lesson because it helps me "normalize" my thoughts to a neutral state. Relinquishing my need to prioritize, or judge my thoughts as "good" or "bad" and just accept what is.

3 - Viable skill - This particular lesson can be used as a viable skill in times of distress. Those times when the mental chatter doesn't stop, and you're letting the machine run away with itself... perpetually judging itself or others as the mind often does. This lesson and skill can be used to help shutdown the mind machine, as the mind seems to focus on what it percieves as "urgent" thoughts, instead of important ones.

I am thankful that we're now blogging our experiences with this text and these lessons, because it really helps me go back and review, and remind myself to integrate these concepts into daily life. Without these concepts in this form, or similar forms - life would be much more problematic.

Some sanity within a dream

I had, what some would call, a bad dream. By ACIM, it could be said that all dreams controlled by us, however seemingly pleasant, are "bad." But I can safely say that since studying ACIM, I've not had a bad dream that didn't have some idea injected that brought some relative sanity to the seeming experience.

In the midst of this fearful dream, came the calming idea that the mechanics of miracles is a process akin to what is seen in splitting the atom (ehow.com, step 7): a neutral idea is sent into a "fissile" person.

Rather than waking up totally dispirited, I awoke with this idea, perhaps, as preface to the Answer to the problem I raised in the dream.

I've been admitting my inability to understand anything, as practiced in the first five lessons, and admitting that I'm not aware of what to do for my own peace, as guided in the text.

Both are coming to my aid in how I'm hearing what's being said to me by loved ones. Despair would be too easy without this help in letting go my own judgement.

I believe this is making me more open to truly non-threatening—neutral—ideas, and making me a more fissile person. I want this reaction to start soon.

Aaron

(I have a back-log of notes on lessons three and four...stay tuned.)

Lesson 3 - "I do not understand all that I see" - Robert

I have spent some time this week reflecting on and applying this concept. The time that I have is usually on the subway. It's a great place that requires your time, but not your effort or attention - giving you an opportunity to do anything you choose. Here's where I usually get a chance to practice these concepts, although I do occasionally apply them as I remember throughout the day. What I like about working on this website is that it's truly a way to physically interact with the learning process, and as I think about the work and content on this site, it reminds me to apply the concepts from ACIM as well.

The concept for Lesson 3 is "I do not understand all that I see." This idea as written previously by Aaron, has to do with the idea that there is a plan for all of this. All of this that we see around us, all that we know is in accordance with a plan. Some people can relate to the word plan, better than words like fate, or destiny... or perhaps divine providence. But essentially the idea attempts to suspend your understanding of all that you see, in such a way as to allow room for another set of pending understandings. This lesson does not deal the pending understanding for all that you see, instead simply attempt the exercise. Well... that's what I did.

At first I found it interesting that my subconscious would rush forth and identify everything for me every time I applied the idea from the lesson. I got used to that, and simply just immersed myself in the experience of "not understanding." I took on a bit of a blank stare as I allowed myself to forget, or not consciously identify the various components of my environment. I did find a rhythm though and found it quite pleasant as the burden of knowledge was lifted. The burden of having to know everything you look at, and just be.

Robert